Animals

Our animals, like our crops, are unlike any others. They are not just animals—they are personalities.

  • Gertie the Cow:
    Gertie, our prized dairy cow, produces an impressive 0.7 milliliters of milk each day. While not quite enough to fill a cup, it’s perfect for making one single, slightly milky coffee. Gertie’s dedication to “giving a little” has earned her a reputation as the most selfless cow on the farm.
  • Lumpy the Goat:
    Lumpy, our goat, is an enigma. He produces no real milk, but instead 3.2 grams of very moist, very disappointing leaves each day. These leaves are often sold to people who are looking for the slightly soggy aesthetic in their floral arrangements.
  • Clearance The chicken:
    Meet Clearance, the farm’s most enigmatic and demanding chicken. This large, misshapen bird sports a haphazard collection of scraggly feathers in shades of muddy brown and beige. With an imposing presence and an attitude to match, Clearance looks like she’s been plucked straight out of a surreal farmyard dream.But don’t let her size fool you—Clearance’s true peculiarity lies in her egg-laying habits. This peculiar chicken will only lay eggs if you’re watching. Glance away for even a moment, and she stops, as if needing the spotlight to perform. The perfect mix of farmyard entertainment and frustration, Clearance ensures your attention is never divided when she’s around.